A cuckolding and strong woman to share her adventures and advice. I like to share :).

Posts tagged ‘Husband’

Cuckold Training Tips

Cuckold Training Tips –

From: tumblr of cucks and hotwives

Although not mandatory, it is common practice to expect the Cuckoldress to receive many more sexual experiences than her cuckolded counterpart. The reasons for this are simple, as the Cuckoldress will have multiple lovers while the cuckold will not, and also because it is generally an accepted practice for the Cuckoldress to have sexual superiority over her cuckold, even to the point of deciding when (or if) her cuckold is lucky enough to be permitted direct sexual contact for the purpose of achieving orgasm. 

Some Cuckoldresses enjoy seeing their cuckolds achieve sexual gratification through direct contact on a regular basis, while others take a completely opposite approach to a cuckold’s orgasms. The path that is ultimately chosen should be decided through obtaining input from both parties, and needs to be carefully explored over the course of time to ensure compatibility, both on the alternative side, as well as the enhancing the core portion of the relationship.  Many Cuckoldresses find additional pleasures in knowing their cuckold receives displeasure or even discomfort, both physically and/or psychologically. Quite often, this may take the form of reduced direct sexual contact, severely regulated acts of masturbation, and sexual and/or orgasm denial. For some Cuckoldresses, it is not enough for the cuckold to remain celibate while his Girlfriend or Wife has other lovers, but sometimes she gains additional pleasure from the knowledge that her cuckold is suffering for her sexual gains as well.  Sometimes, it is very difficult to decide whether denied sexual contact creates greater suffering for the cuckold, or whether not being given the opportunity to masturbate creates greater suffering. For many men, that totally depends on their overall outlook regarding sex. There are men that would be content with regular release, even through masturbation as a legitimate replacement for penetration or receiving oral sex. Many men who have been void of female companionship in their recent past have compensated for the lack of sexual trysts with frequent masturbation. Quite often, this habit has created a situation whereby sex with their significant other is no longer a necessity. If, for example, her cuckold has little or no desire to be denied sexual penetration, then his outlook when visualizing or otherwise knowing another man is penetrating his Wife or Girlfriend may be greatly reduced. Therefore, it is critical that if a Cuckoldress wishes her cuckold to suffer, she needs to be aware of the sexual orientation of her cuckold. Otherwise, she will not be able to achieve the desired effect.

As indicated before, frequent masturbation is a habit that can be broken over a period of time. It takes total and complete dedication on the cuckold’s, as well as the Cuckoldresses’ part, however, the greater responsibility lies with the Cuckoldress. One needs to understand that the motivation for changing this bad habit is generally due to the overall needs of the Cuckoldress. 

Eliminating or greatly reducing a bad habit of over masturbating is done by attacking it in two fronts. Firstly, fitting the cuckold with a male chastity device will greatly assist in the physical aspect of withholding masturbation, but also redirecting his ability to orgasm is just as important. If the cuckold has replaced the joy of intercourse with masturbation, this can be changed over time by utilizing a chastity device to ensure his inability to receive self gratification, but then requiring him to climax only by vaginal penetration over time might tend to re-discovering the rapture of sexual intercourse. Once he has become dependent on climaxing via vaginal sex and that frequent masturbation is no longer satisfying or even possible, his suffering will probably increase when knowing or seeing a lover’s cock deep inside his Girlfriend or Wife vagina. Think of it Ladies – What do you think would happen if your boyfriend or husband found wonderful times pounding your pussy to the best of his ability, only for you to take that away from him by replacing him with another lover or lovers more endowed, or with more stamina, or even possibly discovering the joys of interracial sex, or dare I say, all three? It should also be noted that the same mindset regarding vaginal intercourse can easily be used for oral or anal sex. Let’s face it Girls; if you enjoy seeing your cuckold suffer, just give him great oral sex with all the trimmings and then gleefully take it away and make him watch you give your lovers the same pleasures you used to give him.  In closing, I highly recommend that you listen intently to his sexual history so you can learn all about his likes, dislikes, habits, and fantasies. Naturally, if you still plan on making love with him it is certainly important to know how to make your sex life with him more pleasurable for the both of you. However, if your thoughts have turned to a more sinister (HeHe) course of action, then knowing his weaknesses will go a long way towards cuckolding your honey in ways that will make him more loving, attentive, and compliant to your desires. Suffering may sound cruel for many people, but handled the proper way can help to turn your life, both sexually and otherwise into a very enjoyable situation for all involved.

My night of deviance

I want to watch porn with you.

I’m clothed, you’re naked. You have no idea I’m not wearing panties. My secret lies under my dress. I’ll save it until you’re really naughty.

Watch the screen and think about what you’re seeing. I watch you harden. Throb for me, but don’t touch. But I will touch you when I say so. Don’t say a fucking word. Just throb for me.

I lift my dress and you see my fishnets. My exposed, glistening lips. It’s turned me on so much to watch this with you, not to touch you, but watching you pine, throb, stiffen.

You’re as distracted by me as you are the movie. Don’t say a word. Don’t touch. So much carried within eyes now. Something electric. your cock still twitches. I want it.

The fucking on screen gets ever more sinful, I reach over scratch the very tip of my nail down your shaft, to your balls, to your ass. Drown in your reaction. That violin stroke of your moan. The music of your sex. I want more.

To tighten my fingers around your cock. To hear that deeper, cello. To push faster and faster and faster. This isn’t about holding back, this is about making you cum.

Your hand moved to my knee to steady yourself. Fucking delicious. I know you’re close.

Until..  that scream .. your hips spastic against my punishing fist .. and you cum for me. Hips bucking. So much spunk.

I leave you throbbing and breathless within the moment. Wondering if i’m going to suck you. Lick up every drop.

But you’re still hard. And very sticky.

And I’m demonically in the mood to ride you.

The Profile of a Cuckoldress

So maybe you are at least just the teansy bit  interested in this lifestyle, but just can’t shake the idea that a good and proper woman, or wife, or mother should not act on that curiosity, or even consider it.

So I want to tell you about the women who do consider the thoughts, the daydreams, and the fantasies.  The women who embrace the freedom and act on those thoughts.  

I’ll start with me.

I’m a fairly curvy woman, I was built to pleasure a man. I love to know that he is hot with desire for me and my curvy parts.  I love to see and feel the physical response of  a certain body part only he has and knowing that I was able to do that to him.  Something magical happens inside me when I know that I am the object of a man’s desires.  Even if that desire is never physically realized, it is a HUGE aphrodisiac

I love to be touched and rubbed by my partner, to feel his strong, rough, and yet soft hands on my smooth skin.  My breasts are sensitive, one of my erogenous zones. It tingles when my nipples get hard, the tingling drives me wild, makes me warm, and lustful. Sometimes in the throws of passion, if they aren’t getting enough attention, I’ll rub and stimulate them myself.   I’ve been called a touchy-feely type of girl many times.

I love sex, all parts of sex; the flirting, build-up, and anticipation, the kissing, teasing, and foreplay, the penetration, being filled up, and the building of the orgasm.

How does that sound?  Does that sound too far off a ‘normal’ woman?  Does that sound so different than you?

But wait, that’s not all!!!!!

As much as I would like to say that I am a 24 hour, 7 day a week sex goddess who spends 100% of my time doing and thinking about sexual things, life does interrupt and it must be lived.  I am a regular woman, a wife, a mother, and part of a regular family.

We could be any family that you meet.  We could be your next door neighbors, the family seated next to you at church, or another family on your child’s soccer team.  I could be that new mommy at the playgroup, I could be your best customer at your last Pamperd Chef party, or maybe I started the scrapbook club you so look forward to each month.  We have our jobs, friends, and responsibilites that can’t be neglected just because we want to enjoy our extra sexual fun.

Enough about me, so now what about you?  Think you might fit the profile of a Cuckoldress?

Angela Lewis, PhD, in her book “My Other Self” says yes you do!  Well, okay, maybe not you specifically, but she does say that any ‘normal’ woman could be a cuckoldress.  Her research and observations has led to some conclusions that may surprise many people.

Her full survey results can be seen from the link below, and I’ll list the high points below:

Suvey Results

According to the survey, the definition of a ‘Typical” Cuckoldress:

  • Well-educated
  • White
  • In her thirties
  • In her first marriage and has been in it for at least 11 years
  • Dominant in her relationship, but submissive with her lovers.
  • No preference in race, but does consider penis size when considering lovers
  • Still has sex with her husband.
  • Seperates love from sexual desire.
  • Discrete about her extra-sexual fun

Some of the reasons women gave for choosing this lifestyle:

  • Husband cannot sexually satisfy me
  • I have a high sex drive
  • I had a crush that I wanted to explore
  • My husband worships and adores me and has given me the gift of having all the sex and pleasure that I deserve
  • My husband is an alpha male in his life, but he willingly submits to me sexually and I love to see him lose control
  •  Discovered husband is aroused by this fantasy and I enjoy the power and control

I was surprised by the lack of rules for some couples.  Here are the activitives where most said they have no rules and it depends on the situation:

  • Husband’s allowed participation
  • Condom use – really suprising and scary to me!!!

Finally, most have agreed that cuckolding has strengthened their relationships.

I’m not trying to convince you to live this lifestyle.  It is not for everyone and should not be entered into lightly.  I want you to know that you are not some hussy or something sleazy because these thoughts are in your imagination or because you want to do this.  Don’t let this society or culture tell you want a proper wife should do. 

But if it is fear that is keeping you from doing this, then find ways to manage it.  A little fear is a good thing.  It helps us to pay attention and to consider all the costs and everything that could be changed.  But too much fear is a bad thing.  If it keeps you from being who you want to be, then talk about it with your partner.  Find baby steps that can help you overcome and manage those fears.

You have your own dreams and desires. 

You shouldn’t live in the shadow of your own desires forever. You have to take that chance and make your life reflect who you really are.

Good Luck!!!!

Hotwife Tips

Since the Fuck Buddy tips went so well, how about some hotwife tips.  Add you own:

Sometime talk is not so cheap, especially when trying to convince your man to open up to a cuckold or hotwife relationship.

Ex-talk
While most advice columns caution couples from talking about ex-lovers, for the exceptional woman it is almost mandatory to talk. Women have a particular advantage in all this, since men are obsessed with penis size. It could even be said that Freud’s penis envy afflicts men– not women. Regardless how you really feel about cock size, it is always best to exaggerate your interest. Always keep your husband on his heels. And there are two ways to do this.

The first way: 

Make sure he knows he is not the largest you have been with. Keep things vague, but larger than life. Let him use his imagination. Be coy. If your husband asks about the largest cock you have been with, act like you don’t want to discuss it at first. Tell him that size doesn’t really matter. If he pushes the issue, tell him about a past lover who was huge. If he presses for details, explain he was a few inches larger than the husband, and that sometimes sex was painful.

Over the course of time, you can explain how you have always really liked big cocks. Remind your husband that his is fine for a daily driver, but that sometimes you need a little more. As time progresses, describe another former lover– and how he also had a very large cock. Describe how much you enjoy feeling filled up. You can even explain how while you don’t miss your exlover, you sometimes miss his cock, and that you fantasize about him.

The Second Way:

Exactly the opposite of the first way.  Make your husband know that he is the biggest you have had, but that he is too big.  Tell him how much you love sex and want more of it, but he is so big that it hurts.  Tell him this as you stroke him or suck him.  Tell him how much you love the feel of his BIG (really over emphasize it) cock in your hands and  mouth.  Tell him how wet you get just from thinking about it.  From here, you can talk about having something to help warm you up, maybe even another cock that could help stretch you out first before hubby got to penetrate you.  Since you are keeping him stimulated he will probably try to push the scenerio and ask just what size of cock you need.

You can then tell him about previous lovers who where smaller, but skillful.  Tell him how their cocks could touch just the right spots.  After they get you warmed up, maybe you can take more of your husband’s BIG dick (again add the emphasis).  After that, maybe you can work in another step up in dick size by telling him if that works then maybe you could find a bigger dick.
Celebs
Pick a type— black, latino, older, muscular… you decide. When you see someone who is your type on TV, make comments how hot he is. If you like blacks, every time you watch a program with your husband, comment how sexy your favorite black star is. Tell your husband how you would not hesitate to fuck him and that you would let him have his way with you. Tease your man by asking him if he thinks the celeb is hot. If he says yes, ask if he wants to be fucked by him. If he says no, tell him he is lying.

You can also do this for movies.  When you see a movie that has an actor you find attractive, make that movie the focus of a date night.  You could even tell him how much you would enjoy watching this actor in that movie, and you would enjoy it enough that you could give hubby something special after the show.  You can still tease him, asking him if he thinks the actor is hot.

Coworkers and friends

Tell you husband about a man you know who is hot. Everytime his name comes up, remind your husband how hot he is. Build it up into a crush. Describe the attention you receive from the man, what you were wearing at the time, and so on. Sound obsessive about your interest in him. If the other man is single, be particularly flirtatious, and describe your flirtations in great detail to your husband. Describe how you want to be alone with him and how you wouldn’t hesitate to fuck him if the circumstances allowed.

You can do this with strangers too.  Just pick out some random strangers while you are out and snap some pictures with your cell phone.  You can send them to your hubby with a sexy note.  Or you can save them for later and tell him in your most excited tone about someone you saw today.  Tell him how you normally don’t react this way, but something about this guy just got you going and you couldn’t stop thinking about him and just taking him to some motel for a quickie.

Fantasy talk
In bed, ask your husband what he fantasizes about. It is guaranteed to prompt him to ask you the same question. Go into excruciating detail. For example, if you are into interracial fantasies, tell him how you fantasize about being with two or three black men, who completely have their way with you. Or tell him a fantasy involving someone he already knows, and portray a very realistic fantasy. For example, you are not feeling well, so you stay home from work. A coworker stops by to have you sign some papers. You answer the door in your night clothes. As you invite him in, you find him staring at you, and things develop from there.

Hotwife talk
Tell your husband you fantasize about dating other men– just for the sex and the thrill.  The thrill of that first date and all the nervousness that comes with it, while you know that your big, strong, security net is waiting at home if something goes wrong.   Ask how he feels about it. Tell him you would tell him everything that happened, but that you want to meet one on one with another man. If he doesn’t go for that, explain how he could watch, but not participate. Ask him frequently if he would be comfortable watching a cock sliding in and out of you.

Night Out With the Girls
This is particularly effective if you have single friends. Take a night out with your girlfriends, at least once monthly. Have a few drinks and use the alcohol as an excuse for your flirtations, if you need an excuse. Return home with tales of other men flirting with you, buying drinks, more cell phone pictures, etc. Exaggerate if you must— or better yet, return with a phone number…. or another man.

Just enjoy it and don’t give up!!!

You shouldn’t live in the shadow of your own desires forever. You have to take that chance and make your life reflect who you really are.

You’re ready, but he’s not…

He opened this world of opportunity to you, but now he is getting reluctant.  He got your juices flowing with thoughts of all the possibilites this lifestyle could bring, but now he is getting cold feet and trying to close that door to you.

What’s girl to do????  Things were confusing enough before, but now that you are ready to give him everything he ever wanted, you are at a loss.  Chances are, if he mentioned this idea of you sleeping with other men more than a few times, or included it in your bedroom fun, then he still wants it and just can’t make himself admit it.  He wants you to take charge and make it happen, he wants you to just do it.  He wants you to cuckold him.

Here are a few things to do to keep the idea alive and some good ways to find out just how badly he still wants it:

  1. Keep the idea out in the open.  Let him know how much the idea of having sex with other men turn you on.  Let him know how much you think about it, even telling him how much you find yourself daydreaming about it.  You can do this during your intimate times together, in a teasing email or text message while he is at work, or in the morning share some erotic dream you had of you with another lover and how worked up you were went you woke up.
  2. Work it into your foreplay with dirty talk.  See how he responds, physically, mentally, and emotionally.  If he gets an erection (and most men will) then he is turned on hearing you talk and describe the fantasy.  If he doesn’t tell you to stop then he has allowed his mind to grasp the fantasy and run the images through his mind.  Mentally he has accepted that you have taken another lover and is allowing those images in his mind, using them to enhance his stimulation.
  3. Take note of his erection.  Comment on how hard he is and how long it has been since you’ve seen him that hard.  Ask what it is that is making him so hard.  Of course, you already know, but you might be able to convince him too.  If he cums when you are talking about the fantasy or role playing the fantasy, comment on how much or how hard he cums.  Again, say something about how you wish you knew what it was that made him cum so much.  Of course, you already know 😉 .
  4. If you do find yourself daydreaming about it to the point of masterbation or find your imagination going to other lovers during masterbation, tell him.  The more he sees just how excited you are about the thoughts the more it will bring out the submissive cuck in him who wishes to see nothing but your pleasure and happiness.
  5. When you do share your excitement about the thoughts of taking on another man, do it with excitement in your voice.  Don’t act angry, agressive, or seem hurt.  That will only motivate him to protect you or your relationship by eliminating what it is causing your angry or hurt mood.
  6. Increase your sex drive.  This may be easier said than done, but find something that works for you.  It could be something physical, like exercise or diet, or it could be something mental, like porn (yes ladies, don’t be afraid of a little porn) or even bloggin about it 😉
  7. Take the lead and plan date nights.  Even if your man already plans some, make some plans of your own.  It can start out with a simple date to a movie or trip to the coffee shop.  You can easily work in some fantasy talk by talking about some hot young actor in the movie or picking out a few guys in the coffee shop to make the objects of your imagination.  Mentally, you can also bring those guys back to your bedroom for the night too.

Hmmm, that seems like a good start.  If you have your own ideas, send them to me or post a comment!

Good Luck!!!!

 

Where’s the fun?

A great place to meet others to include in your sexual playtime is in the Swinger Community.  Why you ask??

It is all really simple. Swingers just have more fun! Yes many have wild kinky sex with other people. But most come out to enjoy the ADULT fun that is lacking in the every day world.   These are not some strange wierdos that you would avoid.  The are your neighbors, co-workers, other PTA parents, other playgroup parents, Democrats, Republicans…they are regular everyday people who want to have some fun.  You can be yourself and dress how you like, even say what you please, while being sexy all at once.

 You can talk about your hidden desire to run along the beach naked to people who understand. You can flaunt your hidden tattoo that the folks at the office don’t have a clue about.  You can engage in that ultimate fantasy with others who will cheer you along and not hold you back.  Swingers are all about being who they really are in the comfortably of others who think like them.  No judgement of what you like, what turns you on, what clothes you wear, what car you drive, or how much money you make.

 Does sex with strangers happen at a swingers party? Yes! But do you have to have sex with a stranger? NO! Truth be told most folks who go to a swingers party do not have sex with others or get naked or even flash a boobie. They go to enjoy the freedom and the atmosphere that Swingers offer. But I can tell you who does have wild sex like a frat house, couples after they return from a swingers party! They get caught up in the energy, excitement, and fun of others.  It is contagious and causes them to rediscover talking and the importance of attraction all over again.  They begin to see their partner as a sexual being again and not just the father or mother of their children.

You can read wildly written stories about Swingers and even find some so called Swingers Videos.

 But truth be told, you will really never learn anything about Swingers, the Lifestyle or what it’s all about till you attend a Swingers Event.  It will not come to you on this screen, it will not knock on your door, it is not for sale at WalMart. You have to experience a true, real life Swingers Event to see if it is for you.

 

Thanks to JPJustParties for the inspiration.

Got Questions?????

It looks like my comments on cuckolding get the most looks from you kinky, voyeuristic people, so I want to get you involved.  Shape this blog into what you want it to be and want you want to see!!

Got questions????  Ask me!

Need advice????  Ask me!

Send questions, comments, or advice to me at:

thiswifesturn@yahoo.com

If you send me something, it may get posted here, but no worries love, I will keep all the names and emails for only me!!